glitz porn

This is one of the stranger porn shoots I've seen in a while (full set). WTF is that on her head?

Is that some kind of bridal headdress? It's got tassels and beads and baubles and who knows what else.

Other than that, she's wearing a dotted Swiss tutu, way too much jewelry, and too much makeup. And what's with throwing snow on her beaver?

I think it takes a special kind of man to become all hot and bothered about this. What ever happened to just plain nudity?

why cornflakes are yellow

If you've ever wondered why cornflakes are yellow, it might not be food coloring.

It might be the work of an unknown employee who was videoed pissing on a conveyor belt at Kellogg's plant in Battle Creek, Michigan.

In an apparent attempt to dampen consumer outrage, a Kellogg's public relations talking head said not to worry, the video was made in 2014 or earlier.

So the good news is that box of corn flakes in your cupboard is probably urine free. Of course, the box you ate two years ago may not have been so pure.

In typical PR speak, Kellog's was in effect saying, "Hey, you may have eaten piss flakes two years ago, but you didn't die, did you? What you don't know doesn't hurt you."

Long before this happened, "who pissed in your cornflakes?" was a common phrase people used whenever someone was grumpy.

Now the real culprit has finally been revealed.

ding dong, libido calling

During the last two months of both pregnancies, my libido took a sabbatical. She left suddenly without notice and I had no idea where she went.

After my first son was born, my libido suddenly turned up one day, back with a vengeance. I practically raped my husband one night at home after I put the baby to bed.

So I was curious to see how and when she would return this time. Would she let me know beforehand, so I had a sense she was arriving, or would she just be back all of a sudden?

Turns out, she made a very hasty, unannounced return again this time. However, she decided to come back about two in the afternoon, long before the husband was home.

To add to the complications, we had to put two children to bed before she could be satisfied. While the baby went down with no problem, Joey was in no particular rush to hit the sack.

I'll admit here I outright lied to the child. "Mummy and Da are very tired and have to go to bed early tonight, so how about we start on a story early tonight?"

I had the most erotic images running through my mind when I was distractedly reading Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs aloud. Finally, he drifted off to sleep and I raced down the hall to our bedroom.

Good God Almighty, I'm glad my libido wandered home again, her rudeness in turning up in the middle of the day notwithstanding.

vote trump, get dumped

A grassroots group has formed with a simple motive: to stop people from sleeping with or dating any man who supports Donald Trump.

According to a news story on the MSNBC website, the movement takes inspiration from sex strikes in the classic play Lysistrata, where female characters withhold sex to end the Peloponnesian War.

The Dump Trump movement has a website plus a social media presence on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram, and already has more than 100,000 followers across the three platforms.

Notwithstanding my husband is Australian and cannot vote in the United States, he thinks Trump is a clown, so I'm entirely safe on this front.

But I do support any legal effort to keep Trump out of the White House. If you can use your coochie to stop Trump, I encourage you to do so.

feminine muscle

I recently ran across pictures on the Internet of the woman seen below. She is a champion female powerlifter named Yulia Viktorovna who is nineteen.

Powerlifters build for strength, not for size. But they can't help getting somewhat big in the process.

Because my husband does powerlifting, I've seen more than a few women who do it, too. Not to sound dismissive, but I don't think I would consider any of the ones I've seen particularly feminine.

I think Viktorovna, however, is the first female powerlifter I've seen who hasn't shed her femininity. Yes, she's still obviously strong and bigger in certain areas than a typical woman, but she still also looks like a chick, not a man with tits.

I know some men are really into ripped women, so I have to think Viktorovna attracts lots of attention. Curiously, none of the straight female power lifters I've seen seem to have powerlifting male mates.

I suppose some men are really turned on by the idea of a woman who could easily squeeze them in a deathgrip without breaking a sweat. What did you mean, mister, when you said you didn't finish your housework?

the pregnant pole dancer

Cleo the Hurricane is a professional pole dancer who took time off from work during her recent pregnancy. That didn't stop her, however, from posting pictures on her website showing her nine months pregnant and pole dancing.

I know some people think pregnant women are beautiful and would enjoy her pictures. She admits "I have also never felt so unsexy as I do today" at nine months pregnant." So she had fun dressing up and posing while with child.

I'm glad she enjoyed herself. Good for her if it makes her happy.

With that said, you'd have to pay me a whole hell of a lot of money to do this. I wouldn't be putting free pictures of my pregnant self on the Internet.

I didn't gain nearly as much weight as she did -- only about eighteen pounds, including baby weight -- but there is utterly no way I would ever give away pictures of my pregnant self when I felt very, very un-sexy.

My husband knows I would beat him senseless with a shovel if he ever shared any pregnancy picture of me with anyone outside our house.

neptune's tits

The woman shown below (full set) appears as Neptune on various goth-girl softporn websites. She's one of many women on such sites who appear alone or in mildly lesbian photos and videos as they undress and pose, revealing their tattoo-covered and heavily pierced bodies.

Just as some people are fascinated when they drive by deadly wrecks on the road, I look at these heavily inked women in horrified amazement. What must go through your mind that you decide to permanently disfigure your body like this?

The tattoos on the woman here are capably done, but the artwork looks like it was borrowed from comic books and children's sticker sets. You think you're cute now, but what about at sixty when your tits sag and your skin is wrinkled and nasty?

I'm also curious how these women make a living. Is this all they do, posing and showing off their ink and body bling? Are they strippers or exotic dancers? If so, the industry has sure changed since I was dancing not that awfully long ago.

Did they spend countless hours being tattooed simply because they wanted to pursue a career as goth models? Or did they try conventional modeling, that didn't fly, so they had themselves inked to the gills?

Obviously some men find women like this attractive because plenty of websites make a lot of money selling this kind of material. As for Neptune, why did she name herself after a male god?

suffragette

The night before I went into labor, the husband and I watched Suffragette on DVD. Because of what happened the next day, I didn't have a chance to write about the movie here.

Both of us thoroughly enjoyed the film. James later admitted that before he saw the movie, he thought he'd hate it because he was expecting it to be preachy and in-your-face.

What makes the movie very good is the simple fact that it isn't preachy and in-your-face. It subtly tells the story and avoids messaging and positioning.

The ordinary woman central character sort of accidentally ends up a mild suffragette, but becomes more committed as the story moves forward. The viewer becomes caught up in events concurrent to the character, so it makes her plight seem very real -- we see why she becomes who she does.

Unlike many period films about incidents and events, the movie focuses first and foremost on the characters and weaves history in the background. The result is the people seem real and not just manipulated through real events.

Carey Mulligan is particularly excellent in the leading role. Helena Bonham Carter, Romola Garai, and Meryl Streep are also pitch perfect in supporting roles. And the little boy playing Mulligan's son gave an astounding performance for a small child that most adult actors couldn't master.

This is one of those movies to see even though you might think you'd hate it, because I suspect you'll like it if you give it a chance.

hello world

I'm back to posting. I'll make this a short one today. Thanks to my readers for your good wishes kind words.

Thomas was named for beloved relatives on both sides of his family. It almost picked itself shortly after I realized I was pregnant.

He's a larger newborn than his older brother and weighed a fraction over 4 kilos at birth, which converts to almost 9 pounds. Height came in at 56 centimeters or about 22 inches.

Joey is fascinated by everything having to do with his little brother, particularly how he grips his finger. He carries on long one-way conversations with him, much like he does with the dog.

Looking back, this pregnancy seemed to last about five months, whereas the first one seemed to last more than a year. The second time around was so much better.

I'm still trying to wrap my head around the idea that I have two children now. At once time, I never thought I'd be a mother, but I'm a much different person today.

Tombo is a little angel, of course, but all mothers say that. So far, he's a pretty mellow little guy, just like his older brother was at the same age.

mocking donald's tiny hands

Much is made in the media about Donald Trump's diminutive, child-like hands. Frankly, they look too small for a man his size.

But is it fair to mock him about this? What if Trump had a withered arm, due to a birth defect? Laughing about that would be cruel and heartless.

Ergo, he really can't be faulted for having itty bitty mitts. He shouldn't be mocked for something over which he has no control.

Women can have surgery to make their tits bigger, but a man is stuck with the hands that genetics dealt him.

That's not to say Trump shouldn't be mocked for his ridiculous hair, his sleazy spray-on tan, his hateful un-American ideas, his arrogance, his incessant lying, his fraudulent business practices, or any of his other 2,387,416 faults. He's entirely responsible for those.

Of course, we all know why people mock his hands, because an old saying holds that men with small hands have small dicks. In Donald's defense, I never noticed much of a correlation between the size of a man's hands and the size of his schlong, and I've seen more than a few men naked.

Whether Donald has a big dick, we may never really know. That aside, Donald is a really big dick.

one giant nipple for mankind

I actually like this tattoo. For one, it's small and subtle. Unless you stare at guys' nipples on the beach, it's not something you'd notice right away. It's not a job-killing monstrosity taking up his whole arm and/or face.

But the redness around his nipple is gnarly. That's probably because of the tattoo's newness. This seems to be common on tattoo sites: within hours or minutes of the tattoo's completion, its proud new owner posts pictures for the entire world to see.

IMHO the redness looks like he has a nasty rash. Nasty rashes are not nice to look at. Why not wait until that shit clears up and then post your new tattoo picture? You can wait a week -- it's not like the tattoo will go away.

adorably talented

This is a very funny clip, but Ariana Grande is also super impressive. This would be very difficult for any singer to pull off on live television, but to do it brilliantly requires true genius.

At 22, she's already a huge talent. I suspect she'll only grow in stature in the next few decades into a true megastar.

Plus, she's just adorable.

Baby Thomas Is Here!

This is James stepping in for the hyper wife. Baby Thomas arrived last nite at about eight all in good order. Mum went into labour around four. Hyper will be back online in a few days. Until then she has some posts stacked up for your reading.

hey america, do this now

An enterprising techy Australian has developed an app that's like Tinder to help people connect with pets that need adopting. It's modeled after the popular human hookup app Tinder.

America has so many more people wanting pets and pets needing humans than Australia. This needs to be done in America, too.

I would think some enterprising techy American could set this up in only a matter of days. Given the Internet media's craving need for content, I imagine publicizing it wouldn't be too difficult, either.

Hurry up and do this, America.

resting bitch face

The media seems to be incessantly chattering lately about a made-up malady called Resting Bitch Face. This apparently began as some kind of Internet meme, and now people are taking it seriously like it's a real thing.

It's not. An expressionless face does not mean anything other than something for people to obsess about who have too much time on their hands.

Some people smile all the time and look cheerful. Some people smile all the time and look dimwitted.

And some people don't happen to smile a lot. Or they only smile when they have a specific reason. Get over it. No one is throwing shade on you. You're just not important to them.

In conclusion, one very good thing about the non-existent thing called Resting Bitch Face: you won't develop so many wrinkles.

the ides of march

I'm watching the election returns rolling in here in the middle of an overcast Sydney afternoon. Donald Trump has been called as the winner in three out of the five races voting yesterday, and it looks like he may take a fourth one, too. Marco Rubio has dropped out.

It's official: the inmates have taken over the asylum.

Never has someone less qualified to be President gotten this far in a modern race for the White House. The worse he gets, the more people vote for him.

I'm thinking now, reluctantly, that he will be the Republican nominee, something that seemed laughable six months ago.

Hopefully, somehow, he will be stopped, either on the GOP convention floor or by the Democrats.

Or, you know, maybe a stray meteor or something.

living under house arrest

I don't leave the house now because I know I could go into labor at any moment. My husband put a rubber sheet under the mattress cover a few weeks ago so I wouldn't ruin our fairly new mattress in case I broke my water in bed.

James stopped taking any dive gigs as of the first of the month so he'd be handy if needed. He putters around the house doing various projects and keeps our son entertained to burn off some of his energy.

I cannot tell you how many times I've played Chutes and Ladders and Candyland with Joey, not to mention various card games I've taught him. Getting down on the floor to play with his toys with him is not an option.

I read when Joey is otherwise occupied but only magazines in the last few days. I don't want to be in the middle of a book and then be interrupted by childbirth.

That happened the last time when Joey arrived. I was in the middle of a long book but was interrupted by childbirth. When I finally picked up the book a month later to resume where I left off, I had no idea what had happened and had to start at the beginning again.

I feel like those people who are sentenced to house arrest. If I had to be locked up in the house like this for several years, I think I'd lose my sanity.

Childbirth is like so many things in life: hurry up and wait.

fargo

The husband and I have been watching the TV series Fargo and have quite enjoyed it. We've just finished the first season and are now starting on the second season.

Some of the American humor is lost on my Australian husband so I have to pause and explain. I also do that for some accent gags, too.

I'm torn about whether I would like the broader humor dialed back a bit. Then the program might be more like True Detective -- would that be a good thing? Or would that kill its spirit?

I think stars Allison Tolman, Colin Hanks, and Martin Freeman are all particularly good, but I understand none of them appear in the second season. Billy Bob Thornton also appears in the show, but I'm not a fan of his acting, so I have no real thoughts to add about him.

I know many Breaking Bad fans really like Fargo and I understand why, because they're both in the same tonal universe. All things considered, I think Breaking Bad is a bit stronger as a series, but only by a few hairs.

Each episode begins with a notice that the series is based on a true story, but apparently that's just hokum. The show also reminds me that I do not miss frigidly cold Midwestern winters one tiny bit.

If you haven't seen the show, give it a try. If you've not seen the movie of the same name, it doesn't matter, so don't worry about that.

arabic porn spam

For whatever reason, in the last week or so, I seem to have attracted the attention of some bot that keeps spamming the comments here with Arabic porn spam.

I don't speak Arabic, but when I copied one of the comments into Google's translator, I learned what was what.

I'm guessing someone coded bots so they crawled the web looking for blogs that mention porn so that it could then seed comments.

Some poor fool's computer probably has been hacked due to a virus and is unknowingly sending out this garbage around the clock.

I would think very few people would be lured by obvious spam, but given we have so much spam in the world, some people must. Otherwise, why would spammers invest the effort?

get your asshat

Some clever soul has created a webpage where you can customize Donald Trump's hat. Once you've come up with what you think is the perfect slogan, you can save the image for use on social media and elsewhere.

I cannot think of a man more worthy of this treatment than Donald Trump.

On a somewhat related note, I find it immensely amusing that the Trumpster had to cancel a rally in my hometown of Chicago because the whole thing went off the rails last night.

The man wants to be President but can't plan a relatively straightforward political rally

mugshots and ethics

The Fusion website has an interesting article about how publishing mugshots online has become quite profitable for newspaper websites. That raises the question of whether such practices are ethical.

If John Doe is a public figure and is arrested, arguably his mugshot is newsworthy. Or is it? If a news article publishes information about the arrest, the mugshot in and of itself adds no additional relevant information.

What about people who aren't public figures? If Mary Nobody is arrested for shoplifting, how newsworthy is that? Her trial wouldn't be covered unless something very unusual happened. So why is her mugshot newsworthy but her case itself isn't?

As a compromise, perhaps law enforcement agencies should only release mugshots for people who have been convicted.

With all this said, I freely admit I giggle at odd mugshots. I've posted some of them on this blog in the past.

In my defense, and this might be weak, I don't make any money doing this. I'm just republishing something already published elsewhere.

And now for something different: a vintage Australian gangster mugshot. The full body shot has a bit of style to it, something like a fashion layout in a magazine.

zero hour approaching

My due date is next Tuesday on the Ides of March but, this late in the game, I know I could go into labor at any time. As of last Friday, I was not dilated, so it's looking like later rather than sooner.

I was hoping to deliver on my husband's birthday this week, but that's probably not too likely. Last time I was late, so I would not be surprised if I'm late again this go round, too.

Last time, I was torn about going into labor -- I wanted it to happen so the discomfort of pregnancy would be over, but I was also somewhat terrified about experiencing labor.

This time, while I'm uncomfortable, I'm used to it so I just want to go into labor when it's more convenient for both my husband and me. The somewhat terrified mindset is not an issue this time.

I am fully prepared around the house like I was last time, so I'm ready for labor to come at any time. As for online, my Tumblr has a full six weeks of posts already queued and I have three weeks of daily posts queued for this blog.

Hopefully husband James will post an update when the actual day arrives, but in the meantime, I'll keep posting day to day.

politically too correct

Harvard University recently was involved in a nasty kerfuffle involving its law school crest. The item in question (seen below) is a shield with three wheat sheaves and the Latin word Veritas, the university's motto, which translates as "truth."

Some students objected to the shield because it was adapted from the family crest of a major donor to the law school whose father once owned slaves.

IMHO, this is political correctness gone out of control. How many people would be offended by a clump of wheat? It's not like it was a swastika.

If something is patently visible as racist to many people -- a Nazi flag, a Confederate flag, etc. -- then removing it is understandable. But the pretzel logic in the Harvard dustup is ridiculous.

This is not the first time Harvard has been embroiled in a political correctness battle. Several months ago, the university stopped using the term "house master" to refer to dorm administrators because some students found that racially offensive.

Never mind that the term "house master" originated in British boarding schools and universities and had utterly no connection to slavery.

People should focus on policies and actions that actually are discriminatory and not this sort of overly sensitive navel gazing.

I would not be surprised if Harvard did away with masters degrees because, you know, racism. Or something.

badass choo choo man

I thought this was a Photoshop fake when I first saw it. But it's real -- action star and professional badass Jason Statham on a kiddie choo choo. (Original enlargement.)

This was posted on his official Twitter without any explanation about its origins. He has no children so it is a mystery how he ended up on a kids' ride.

Some males think they're too tough to act silly. But a real man isn't afraid to show he doesn't take himself too seriously. Sometimes silly can be very sexy.

renouncing my citizenship

Because my husband's relatives are Australian, they pay little attention to Donald Trump and seem to view him as a crass buffoon who represents America's worst excesses. They know I despise him and accordingly dislike him, too.

While seeing family over the weekend, one of my husband's brothers jokingly asked if I would renounce my American citizenship if Trump were elected President.

I know he was teasing me and laughed along, but the serious answer is that I would never renounce my American citizenship, no matter what.

Even if he is elected, Trump does not represent the America I love. Yes, he likely would do significant damage to both the American economy and our international standing, but America would survive and bounce back once he was gone.

I've become pretty much resigned to the fact that Trump will likely be the GOP nominee, although that's far from a certainty. He's winning in the polls and more often than not at the ballot box, thanks to weak competition, but a lot of pundits believe that would lead to a brokered convention where he'd be knocked off the ballot.

At this point, whoever ends up the GOP nominee will almost certainly face Hillary Clinton, who looks more and more likely to be the Democrat's nominee with each passing day. She's not my favorite person, but I think she is best equipped to metaphorically rip off Trump's testicles and cram them down his throat.

If she can do that, she'll pretty much prove she has what it takes to be the first female President of the most powerful nation on earth.

overlit porn

I do not understand why many porn photographers over-light a shoot so it looks like it was shot in an office building lobby and not in the intimate privacy of a bedroom. The shot below is a good example (click for the full set).

In my own bedroom, I have no problem leaving a single light on during sex after dark. Turning on eight lights, each with a 500-watt bulb, however, is not something I'd want.

Silly me, I guess I have this idea that porn should simulate reality and be highly erotic yet realistic. I just can't get turned on by porn that looks like it was shot in a department store at high noon.

ben's bigass tattoo

Ben Affleck has had an enormous tattoo inked all over his back, which has been seen underneath clothing he's been wearing in public and on a Los Angeles set. The tattoo is real and not some movie makeup effect.

IMHO, while the tattoo is well done, the enormous size is pretty tacky. It seems rather trailer trash to me, not something you'd expect on a middle-aged movie actor.

A back tattoo always seemed like a dumb idea to me -- why bother getting one if you can never see it yourself. My husband has a small back tattoo he had inked when he was in his late teens.

He now agrees it was a stupid thing to do and originally thought it would impress women on the beach, which it never really did. I can't think that's the same reason Affleck decided on this one.

I guess we have to chalk Ben's new ink up to a midlife crisis.

was it something I said?

Over the past few weeks, I've noticed a larger drop in the number of subscribed readers here. I didn't receive any significant negative email or comments and a specific post, so I was puzzled.

It turns out I'm not alone. In the last several days, I happened to read a few other blogs hosted here on Blogger and found this is a common problem for many/most bloggers.

For whatever reason, the number of subscribers will suddenly drop by several dozen in a day. The next day, a few dozen mysteriously return.

With time, however, more readers disappear than reappear, so the overall number drops. It seems to be some sort of counter problem, which Google doesn't seem in any hurry to fix.

Meanwhile, the number of subscribers to my Tumblr page keeps growing. Right now, I have more than 42,000.

By the way, the photo below would make a great desktop or screensaver because of its size. Right click and save.

the caveman's toenails

My husband clipped my toenails last night because it's physically impossible to do when you're eight-and-a-half months pregnant.

I have this weird thing about other people grooming my toes, even when that person is the man I love, so it was not something I enjoyed.

While he was snipping, I started thinking aloud about how people clipped their nails in previous centuries. How the hell did they do it?

Google, of course, had lots of answers. One of the most detailed I found is at Reddit, which has tons of links to other sources.

How about before humanoids developed sophisticated tools, like in 25,000 BC or earlier? Fingernails were probably naturally short because a lot of manual tasks were necessary to survive.

But what did the caveman's do about his toes? I can't think that even with a lot of walking and running around, toenails would be worn down very much. They had crude axe heads and spear tips way back when, but they would be too big and blunt to trim toenails.

So I guessed several possible results. One might be a rougher small pebble or small stone was used like an emery board.

But such resources might not always be found. So maybe because younger people were flexible enough, they bit their own toenails to keep them trimmed.

And perhaps when people got a little older, before dying a fairly early death, they bit each other's toenails to keep from growing too long. That could've been a foreplay situation, too.

How about I chew your toenails tonight?

No thanks, I think I feel a headache coming on.

My husband told me I'm the only person who he's ever known who wonders about crazy things like this.

pretty in pink

It took a moment for this image to sink in. She looks familiar.

And then I recognized the person: a mashup of evil villainess Dolores Umbridge and you-know-who.

He makes a really ugly woman. But he is somehow feminine in a prison matron sort of way.

porn meets comedy

This made me laugh so hard I peed myself. The premise is simple: two comedians feed dialog to performers in the middle of a porn scene.

The male is wooden in the beginning, but he gets into it and is quite funny. The woman's accent makes her lines less funny, but Nikki Glaser uses her screwups and makes it even funnier.